Logo, MARRIAGE 101 MINISTRIES - Marriage Counseling
 
(210) 521-8668  
6619 Laurelhill Drive, San Antonio, TX 78229 

The following courses are taught throughout the years to come. We teach a total of 3 courses out of these per year. We have them listed here for you to refer to for our archived notes. Our students have access to all the notes when the they email a request to starr@marriage101.net  

HOW WE LOVE SEX...OR DON'T

Kick-off BBQ & Info Night... 6-9pm

Class 1- Introduction to the love styles...6:15-7pm...Eat  7-9pm...Class




Class 2- Sex The Great Exposer (36:16)

 How the love styles affect sexual intimacy: the avoid-er the pleaser (23:02).... 6:15-7pm...Eat 7-9:00 pm Class




Class 3- How we love styles affect sexual intimacy.

The vacillator, the controller the victim (41:46). Overcoming cultural influences: expectations (40:11) 6:15-7pm...Eat  7-9:00pm Class 




Movie Night...6-9pm




Class 4- Male and female sexual responses and desire differences (28:33)




Class 5- Moving towards better sex (36:37)...6:15-7pm...Eat  7pm-9pm...Class




Class 6- The value of virginity and fedility




(60 minutes...God's picture of sex (16 minutes)...6:15-7pm Eat.....7-9pm Class 

Graduation...6-9pm 




THE PARENTHESES DESIGNATE THE DURATION OF THE TEACHINGS DVD'S. WE WILL ALWAYS HAVE THE CLASS AFTER THE DVD'S. 

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"HIS & HER NEEDS"

6-9pm Kick-Off BBQAll students come to our home & register for the classes to begin the following week. We provide the food & fun and you provide the fellowship. Students have a chance to meet each other and know where we live so its easier when we begin classes next week. 




 Class 1: MAIN CLASS: NEEDS

-Identifying each others most important emotional needs and developing habits to meet them.
-What the different love styles need 

MEN'S BREAKOUT:

Differences or "You don't have a clone!"
-Understanding the main differences between men and women-
-How to blend together as a couple in order to be used for God's glory as opposed to fighting the differences in your wife and trying to force her to change to be more like you.

WOMEN'S BREAKOUT

Differences or "Do you want a man or a mouse?"
-
Major differences between men and women

-Learning to appreciate the man in your man and to stop trying to make a woman out of him.





Class 2: MAIN CLASS: FORGIVENESS

-How the different love styles handle forgiveness
-Why should you forgive
-How to identify if you have truly forgiven your spouse
-How to forgive
-What forgiveness is and is not
-How to stop taking "back" the forgiveness you grant to your spouse

MEN'S BREAKOUT: Emotions - Yours & hers
-Lies in your head that produce division

-Your anger-her fear
-Your pride- her retreat
-Your mistrust-her insecurity
-Your unforgiveness- her sadness
-Your protection-her release
-Your joy-her peace

WOMEN'S BREAKOUT: Quietness-
-The hidden power of a wife

-What quietness is and is not
-Why a quiet spirit is so precious to God and to your husband
-How to be quiet and still have peace





Class 3: MAIN CLASS: COMMUNICATION

-How the different love styles communicate
-Anatomy of an argument
-How to be a good listener-(demonstrated for you)
-Communicating the negative
-Communicating the positive
-No cussing, threats, physical outbreaks, leaving the area

MEN'S BREAKOUT
-How the different love styles communicate

-Responsibilities- "But..."
-Responsibility defined
-What are the primary responsibilities of a man before marriage and a husband after marriage

WOMEN'S BREAKOUT
-Help meet

-What is your role in the marriage
-Love never fails-so what IS love anyway?




Class 4: MAIN CLASS: THE CONTROLLING SPOUSE (“Some people try to be tall by cutting off the heads of others.”)

-How the different love style control
-Who actually is supposed to be in control in a marriage?
-Why people are controlling
-How to deal with a controlling spouse
-How to deal with controlling relatives

MEN'S BREAKOUT
-Why men feel a need to control

-Control vs. vulnerability
-Accepting yourself-accepting her
-You do not have to say something, have the last word or always be right-really!
 
WOMEN'S BREAKOUT
-Why women feel the need to control

-Allow him who be whom God made him to be
-Yield Faith & trust-the anecdote to control
-STOP: giving advice to everyone; planning every second of everyone's day;
-GO with the flow, become more flexible

 




Class 5: MAIN CLASS: CONFLICT

-How the different love styles argue
-Polite & courteous
-Honor & respect
-Yielding
-Validation Vs. Indifference
-Criticism Vs. Praise

MEN'S BREAKOUT: Know your wife, know yourself
-Observe body and face language and voice inflection

-Becoming an expert on your wife
-Don’t embarrass her or your children
-Learn to turn it all around
-Seek to understand MORE than to be understood

WOMEN'S BREAKOUT: Mothering & smothering
-What is a mother? Her responsibilities etc.

-What is a wife? Her role
-He already has a mama
-Lover or mother-Leave the boy alone! Trust him!

 




CLASS 6: MAIN CLASS: SEX- WE WILL BEGIN WITH MARK GUNGOR'S DVD "THE #1 KEY TO INCREDIBLE SEX!

  • Love styles & intimacy
  • True and lasting satisfaction
  • -Becoming a lover in lieu of a taker
  • -Destructive expectations
  • -The golden rule- song of Solomon 
  • -Intimacy or “What does Casanova have on me!?”
  • -Bonding
    -Definition of the real man
    -Shifting brain gears when entering the house
    -Sensitivity & manliness
    -What a woman really wants in a lover

Preparing your spirit for your one-flesh
-Becoming an excellent lover to your husband

-What romance is to your husband
-Destructive expectations
-Modesty & humility, gentleness & kindness
-What a man really wants in a lover


"FUN, ROMANCE & INTIMACY"


6-9pm KICK-OFF BBQ

 All students come to our home & register for the classes to begin the following week. We provide the food & fun and you provide the fellowship. Students have a chance to meet each other and know where we live so it’s easier when we begin classes next week.

Please plan to come as close to 6 as possible and plan on staying the entire 3 hours for this night only. This is a very important bonding time between you and the other students as well as with Bob & I. Make the time-Take the time- If we can for your marriage, you can.




TIME FOR all classes: 6:15-7:00 pm to eat & 7:00-9:15 pm for class

CLASS 1: BECOMING ONE 

We talk about the different dances you each had when you met and how it changed over time and how to dance without stepping on each other’s toes, how to become and stay best friends, frequent lovers, the power & intimacy of praying together and supporting each other when there are adverse health issues.




CLASS 2:  HUMOR IS A SERIOUS BUSINESS 

The importance and benefits of humor and rediscovering fun on a daily basis. How laughter and fun can heal you physically, emotionally and martially and bring about a great peace for your entire family and home. Many tips on how to get the laughter & joy going in your lives.




CLASS 3:  ROMANCE & GET-AWAYS 

Most women love romance and most men find it a mystery. We will explain what “it” is, how to experience it, how men can become more comfortable and even confident being a lover, how women can encourage their husbands to be romantic without them feeling nagged, and how men can make their wives melt with their words like they used to!



MOVIE NIGHT!!!   Come join us for hot dogs, ice cream bars, candy and popcorn and a great show! You will learn (with laughter) the differences between men & women, what turns them off & on and why we are the way we are- do not miss this one!! It’s a mandatory class. This night will be from 6:00-9:15pm, so make arrangements in advance accordingly.




CLASS 4: INTIMACY: PART 1 

Let’s get creative- drop the boring act! This is an introduction to what makes you tick, why you respond the way you do sexually is from imprints in your early childhood- how to re-groove the record- understanding each other’s point of view. How to blend your sexual/love styles to make some beautiful music-a symphony!




CLASS 5: INTIMACY: PART 2 

How to get the desire & energy back to have stunning intimacy rather than 2 minute, self-gratifying sex. How putting each other first, before yourself, will open the spirit & flesh to you to enrich your intimate time. How forgiveness & trust will change your bedroom activities from a walk-in freezer to a “hunk of burning love” as Elvis would say!




CLASS 6: INTIMACY: PART 3 

Oh yea! Making out, lovemaking longer than 2 minutes at a time, teasing, dancing and flirting- does not have to be a thing of the past! How to reignite the fire and passion in your marriage-rediscover and rejuvenate! Discover your sexual love-styles.




End of class BBQ party & testimonies

 Couples hear each other’s’ testimonies of how their marriages were changed by taking the classes- we eat and listen and each couple who has attended all classes receives their certificate for the completed semester. An opportunity to register for the upcoming marriage retreat in November will be available.


"GETTING ALONG"


 KICK-OFF BBQ & INFORMATION/SIGN-UP NIGHT
: 6:00pm-9:00pm

The meal is on us! Come and meet other couples who are all in different places in their marriages- the common denominator? You are all coming to make it better- communication etc. No matter how good you think your marriage is, it can always get better. By the same token, no matter how hopeless it seems or how trapped you may feel right now, we can show you a better way. Starr & Bob will be sharing what these classes will entail.




Class 1: HOW TO AVOID ARGUMENTS
We want them to WANT to be there for us when we argue- identifying a man and a woman’s needs- how to meet your mate’s needs- how to enlist your spouse’s support and causend listen to every word you say- how a couple can learn to argue BRIEFLY without wounding each other and recover quickly.




Class 2: THE 5 LANGUAGES OF APOLOGY AND FORGIVENESS
How many ways are there to say “I’m sorry?” Well, it depends on your language of apology. Just as you have a different love language, you also hear and express the words and gestures of apology in a different language.





Class 3: IN-LAWS
Learn how to handle difficult in-laws- how to put your spouse first, above all others- how to honor your parent in-laws- how to establish healthy boundaries.




MOVIE NIGHT!!!
We break out the chili hot dogs, popcorn, nachos, candy & ice cream- well, everything they have at the movies! We always show a funny and highly entertaining, educational speaker on a particular marriage topic. This night will be from 6:30-9:15pm, so make arrangements in advance accordingly. (no childcare available at any class)

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Class 4: ANGER & OTHER INTENSE EMOTIONS
We will be covering anger, jealousy, revenge, paranoia, unforgiveness and so much more! Come learn how to overcome your destructive emotions.

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Class 5: RESPECT & HONOR
What is honor and how do you begin to show it and teach it to your children by example with your spouse in your home- what it will do for your marriage. How to start speaking to each other with humility and kindness and respect and how to end the destructive sarcasm.

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Class 6: HOW TO HANDLE CONFLICT WITHOUT DAMAGING YOUR RELATIONSHIP
Is it really possible to disagree without tearing each other apart? We will show you how!

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END OF CLASS GRADUATION AND TESTIMONIES
This is the night all of our couples invite friends and family to come and hear how the classes have changed their marriages from the couples themselves. One by one, they will share for 5 minutes each about which class changed their marriage for the better. After all have shared, everyone will be given the opportunity to sign up for the next set of classes which will start 8-10 weeks later.


"DESTRUCTIVE LIFE PATTERNS"


TIME FOR all classes: 6:15-7:00 pm to eat & 7:00-9:15 pm for class

KICK-OFF BBQ- ICE BREAKER
Bring your swimsuit, play billiard, air hockey, poker-time, watch movies on the big screen, play the slots- time to be a kid again and have some good clean fun with other couples who will be in our  class- make new friends!

Please plan to come as close to 6 as possible and plan on staying the entire 3 hours for this night only. This is a very important bonding time between you and the other students as well as with Bob & I.  Make the time-Take the time- If we can for your marriage, you can.

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CLASS 1-IMPRINTS
What  you experience up to the age of 8 is imprinted on you and greatly affects the rest of your life- your marriage, the way you look at work and how you will raise your own children. How to re-groove the record which keeps playing destructive life patterns.

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CLASS 2-PHYSICAL, VERBAL & PSYCHOLOGICAL ABUSE
You may be surprised to find out what actually qualifies as abuse these days. You may know some who does not realize they are abusing their spouse and be able to reach out and help them after this class.

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CLASS 3-TEXTING, CHATTING, INTERNET, CELL PHONES
The very tools we use to communicate in business and with our loved ones can lead to affairs and eventually divorce if we do not use them correctly. Come and find out how to avoid these problems and protect your relationship.

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MOVIE NIGHT
Fun, Fellowship & Food- Popcorn, hot Chili-Dogs, Ice cream & candy bars- all the fix ins you get when you go to the movies. The movie? The differences between men & women- very funny and educational!

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CLASS 4-HOW TO RE-ESTABLISH TRUST
After trust has been broken or lost because of indiscretions, certain measures must be taken to restore that trust- come and learn how to be healed in this area and start really living again free. 

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CLASS 5-FRUITS OF THE SPIRIT & THE WORKS OF THE FLESH
If your life was a garden, what would the ration of fruit versus weeds be? Come to this class to discover what brand of weed killer you need to stop choking out all of your good crops. 

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CLASS 6-HOW TO WALK IN AGREEMENT
How to start reading the Bible, selecting the right church for your family and how to change into the man or woman God wants you to be.

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END OF CLASS TESTIMONIES AND GRADUATION
This is the night all of our couples invite friends and family to come and hear how the classes have changed their marriages from the couple themselves. One by one, the couples will share for 5 minutes each about which class changed their marriages from for the better. After all have shared, everyone will be given the opportunity to sign up for the next set of classes which will start 8 weeks later.


"HOW TO SOLVE EVERYDAY ISSUES"

TIME FOR all classes: 6:15-7:00 pm to eat & 7:00-9:15 pm for class

KICK-OFF BBQ- ICE BREAKER
(Depending on the time of the year)! Bring your swimsuits, play billiards, air hockey, watch movies on the big screen, slot (Depending on the time of the year!) Bring your swimsuit, play billiards, air hockey, poker, watch movies on the big screen, slot machines-time to be a kid again and have some good clean fun with other couples who will be in our class- make new friends!

Please plan to come as close to 6 as possible and plan on staying the entire 3 hours for this night only. This is a very important bonding time between you and the other students as well as with Bob & I. Make the time-Take the time- If we can for your marriage, you can.

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CLASS 1- WORK & TIME TOGETHER
Learning how to support each other’s work. Become a “reformed” workaholic for the sake of the marriage.

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CLASS 2- BLENDING LIVES
Yours, his & yall’s kids!!! Add to that, all the in & out laws. Plus, working out discipline, ex’s, respect and chore arguments! No wonder the stress points are going through the roof. In this class, we teach you both how to make 2 into 1. Apart, you are less than 1; together, you are more than 2!

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CLASS 3- HIS & HERS RESPONSIBILITIES (ROLES)
RESPONSIBILITY- responding to one’s ability. We discuss accountability, being dependable, everyone stepping up to the plate- men providing for the financial needs of their family, the educational needs in teaching the Word of God to their kids & wives, the spiritual needs of their family by leading by example in attending church regularly and praying for & with them. Wives, learning how to unconditionally respect, admire and support their husbands. And, so much more-

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MOVIE NIGHT!!!-- Fun, fellowship & food- popcorn, hot chili dogs, ice cream & candy bars- all the fix ins you enjoy when you go to the movies.

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CLASS 4- COMMUNICATION
This class will include the five love languages test & descriptions so you can discover yours & your spouses too. There will be much less arguments when you understand each other- how to motivate and what will discourage so you can avoid it. Also included will be problem solving & how to pray together.

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CLASS 5- HOUSEHOLD CHORES
Times have changed- men do as much housework as women if the wives work outside the home, or do they? We will cover how strife is fueled by a cluttered, messy home and how to share the load with each other.

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CLASS 6- MONEY-WHO & HOW
Who should handle the checkbook? Should you always consult with each other before a purchase? If so, when it comes to spending what amount? Budgets, allowances etc.

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END OF CLASS GRADUATION AND TESTIMONIES 
This is the night all of our couples invite friends and family to come and hear how the classes have changed their marriages from the couple themselves. One by one, the couples will share for 5 minutes.  Each about which class changed their marriage for the better. After all have shared, everyone will be given the opportunity to sign up for the next set of classes which will start 8 weeks later. 


MARRIAGE 101- UNDERSTANDING EACH OTHER

KICK-OFF/INFORMATION AND SIGN-UP NIGHT:  
6pm-9pm

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CLASS 1- MAIN CLASS: NEEDS
Identifying each other’s most important emotional needs and developing habits to meet them.
What the different love styles need

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

MEN'S BREAKOUT: DIFFERENCES OR "YOU DON'T HAVE A CLONE!"
Understanding the main differences between men and women-how to blend together as a couple in order to be used for God's glory as opposed to fighting the differences in your wife and trying to force her to change to be more like you.

WOMEN'S BREAKOUT DIFFERENCES OR "DO YOU WANT A MAN OR A MOUSE?"
Major differences between men and women
Learning to appreciate the man in your man and to stop trying to make a woman out of him.

CLASS 2- MAIN CLASS: FORGIVENESS

  1. How the different love styles handle forgiveness
  2. Why should you forgive
  3. How to identify if you have truly forgiven your spouse
  4. How to forgive
  5. What forgiveness is and is not
  6. How to stop taking "back" the forgiveness you grant to your spouse

MEN'S BREAKOUT: EMOTIONS - YOURS & HERS

  1. Lies in your head that produce division
  2. Your anger-her fear
  3. Your pride- her retreat
  4. Your mistrust-her insecurity
  5. Your unforgiveness- her sadness
  6. Your protection-her release
  7. Your joy-her peace

WOMEN'S BREAKOUT: QUIETNESS- 1 Peter

  1. The hidden power of a wife
  2. What quietness is and is not
  3. Why a quiet spirit is so precious to God and to your husband
  4. How to be quiet and still have peace

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________

CLASS 3- MAIN CLASS: COMMUNICATION
How the different love styles communicate
Anatomy of an argument
How to be a good listener-(demonstrated for you)
Communicating the negative
Communicating the positive
No cussing, threats, physical outbreaks, leaving the area

MEN'S BREAKOUT
How the different love styles communicate
Responsibilities- "But..."
Responsibility defined
What are the primary responsibilities of a man before marriage and a husband after marriage

WOMEN'S BREAKOUT
Help meet
What is your role in the marriage
Love never fails-so what IS love anyway? Corinthians

MOVIE NIGHT: 6pm-9pm

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CLASS 4- MAIN CLASS: CONTROLLING (“SOME PEOPLE TRY TO BE TALL BY CUTTING OFF THE HEADS OF OTHERS.”)
How the different love style control
Who actually is supposed to be in control in a marriage?
Why people are controlling
How to deal with a controlling spouse
How to deal with controlling relatives

MEN'S BREAKOUT
Why men feel a need to control
Control vs vulnerability
Accepting yourself-accepting her
You do not have to always be right

WOMEN'S BREAKOUT
Why women feel the need to control
Allow him who be whom God made him to be
Yield
Faith & trust-the anecdote to control
STOP: giving advice to everyone; planning every second of your day;
GO with the flow, become more flexible

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

CLASS 5- MAIN CLASS: CONFLICT
How the different love styles argue
Polite & courteous
Honor & respect
Yielding
Validation vs indifference
Criticism vs praise

MEN'S BREAKOUT: KNOW YOUR WIFE, KNOW YOURSELF
Observe body and face language and voice inflexion
Don’t cause embarrassment
Learn to turn it all around
Seek to understand MORE than to be understood

WOMEN'S BREAKOUT: MOTHERING & SMOTHERING
What is a mother? Her responsibilities etc.
What is a wife? Her role
He already has a mama
Lover or mother
Leave the boy alone! Trust him!

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________

CLASS 6 MAIN CLASS: SEX
Love styles & intimacy
True and lasting satisfaction
Becoming a lover in lieu of a taker
Destructive expectations
The Golden Rule- Song of Solomon

MEN'S BREAKOUT: INTIMACY OR “WHAT DOES CASANOVA HAVE ON ME!?”
Bonding
Definition of the real man
Shifting brain gears when entering the house
Sensitivity & manliness
What a woman really wants in a lover

WOMEN'S BREAKOUT: PREPARING YOUR SPIRIT FOR YOUR ONE-FLESH
Becoming an excellent lover to your husband
What romance is to your husband
Destructive expectations
Modesty & humility, gentleness & kindness
What a man really wants in a lover

END OF CLASS TESTIMONIES AND GRADUATION: 6pm-9pm


BACK TO BASICS- CLASSES DESCRIPTION

Class 1: KICK-OFF ICE BREAKER

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Class 2: CLASS 1-FORGIVENESS & PRAYING TOGETHER
How to forgive- what forgiveness is and not. What happens when you choose not to forgive. How to start praying together daily as a couple, ( what it will do for your marriage) stand back and watch the miracles- prayer is a shortcut. 

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Class 3: NO CLASS-SPRING BREAK

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Class 4: CLASS 2- BALANCE: GOD, FAMILY, WORK & MONEY
How to bring your life and marriage into balance 

Learning how to support each other's work. Become a "reformed" workaholic for the sake of the marriage.

Who should handle the checkbook? Should you always consult with each other before a purchase? If so, when it comes to spending what amount? Budgets, allowances etc. 

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Class 5: CLASS 3- HONOR, LOVE, RESPECT AND TRUST
What is honor and how do you begin to show it and teach it to your children by example with your spouse in your home- what will do for your marriage. How to start speaking to each other with humility and kindness and respect and how to end the destructive sarcasm. 

After trust has broken or lost because of indiscretions, certain measures must be take to restore that trust- come and learn how to be healed in this area and start really living again free. Learn how to handle difficult in-laws- How to put your spouse first, above all others- how to honor your parent in laws- how to establish healthy boundaries. 

How to respect one another- respect is different to a man than it is to a woman

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Class 6: MOVIE NIGHT
Fun, fellowship & food- popcorn, chili-dogs, ice cream & candy bars- all the fix ins you get when you go to the movies. The movie? the differences between men and woman- very funny and educational! 

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Class 7: CLASS 4- BLENDED FAMILIES, IN-LAWS & OUTSIDE FRIENDS
Yours, his & yall's kids!! How to get along together.

Learn how to handle difficult in laws- How to put your spouse first, above all others- How to honor your parent in laws- How to establish healthy boundaries.

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Class 8: CLASS 5- COMMUNICATION & ARGUMENTS
Why we argue- identifying a man and a woman's needs- How to meet your mate's needs- how to enlist your spouse's support and cause them to want to be there for you and listen to every word you say- how a couple can learn to argue briefly without wounding each other. Recover quickly and move on without looking back. Is it really possible to disagree without tearing each other apart? We will show you how!

Communications style differences--how to be a good listener-(demonstrated for you)- communicating the negative-communicating the positive 

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Class 9: CLASS 6- MAKING A NEW PLAN FOR CHANGE-WORKSHOP
By this week, you would have accumulated 5 weeks of notes summarizing in each class how you want to improve your marriage and what changes need to be made. Now is the time to make your plan! We will show you how to get from point A-B. 

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 End of Class Testimonies 
This is the night all of our couples invite friends and family to come and hear how the classes have changed their marriages from the couple themselves. One by one, the couples will share for 5 minutes each about which class changed their marriage for the better. After all have shared, everyone will be given the opportunity to sign up for the next set of classes. 


All classes are held in San Antonio, Texas. Check back frequently on this site for schedule changes.


E-mail office@marriage101.net